Read All About It
by mayajane
Summary: Struck by a sudden tragedy, Hermione falls into a depression that only a certain someone can pull her out of. Rated M


A/N: New story out finally so review if you like. Sorry it starts out this way!

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I ran hard, my chest heaving up and down, drenched with sweat. Beside me was Lavender Brown running just as fast as I was but I charged sprinting pass her. Laughter escaped my lips and again I heard Lavender grunt angrily. I passed the finish line and rolled onto the pavement. A few seconds later Lavender crossed but the other girls were much further behind. Lavender was the only real competition. She sat down beside me and brushed the sweat off her forehead.

"Every damn time, 'Mione." She said with a huff. I grinned and pushed her.

"You 'll beat me. Just keep practicing." I told her but she and I both knew it would never happen. I was too fast. Too good. Only Marie could beat me; my best friend from home. We grew up together, her mom and my mom friends when they were little too. When I got my Hogwarts letter I though we might drift apart, but it only renewed our sisterhood. She loved hearing about magic and I love hearing about her muggle schools. We were both homeschooled up until my letter and then I came to Hogwarts and Marie went to a middle school to have some new friends. I get weekly letters from her all about her knew times on runs and boys who she turned down. I heard noises and my attention came back to the present.

The other girls crossed the line and were heaving so badly I thought they might throw up. It had happened a few times.

"You two are something else." Parvati wheezed. I laughed and stood up.

"Everyone just needs to keep going. We'll all get there. Good practice all around. See you guys Friday, alright?" I said and all the girls nodded getting to their feet lethargically. The walk up the castle was hard after all the running even for me, so Lavender and I leaned on each other. Ginny skipped over to us with a sad smile.

"I wish I could run with you, it looks like so much fun." Ginny was on the Quidditch team, but besides that she was expecting. Two months along.

"You can run for a few months Gin, I looked it up. Its completely safe as long as you have yourself scanned afterward."

We finally reached the gate and practically crawled to the entrance. The boys were waiting for us and Harry reached for Ginny first. He was over protective but Ginny didn't seem to mind. The other girls walked slowly to the great hall. It was just about dinner time and all that running made us all ravenous.

Ron walked beside me when Lavender said goodbye and went to sit with Parvati and her sister.

"Good run?" He asked as he did after every practice.

"Yeah, it was good." I said softly. Ron and I weren't on the best of terms since he cheated on me. But I was a forgiving person, mostly. I doubt we'll ever be the same. Ron wondered away and I sat with Ginny.

"You guys are getting so fast. Especially you and Lavender. I thought she might beat you today but you always seem to get this last burst of energy. It really was a good idea to make the team. Have something for the girls who aren't really into Quidditch."

I smiled at Ginny and piled fruit and veggies onto my plate. I looked over at the other girls and saw they were doing the same.

"When is your first race?"

I grinned, "Saturday."

"Its all so exciting." Ginny exclaimed suddenly. I laughed at her enthusiasm. Only Marie's enthusiasm could beat Ginny's.

"The girls are excited too. Its really great the Headmaster Snape let us start the team." I said munching on celery. Ginny was piling peanut butter on a banana very intently.

"Yeah I thought he might be a sore loser about all that you know, but it worked out okay." Everyone was quiet all around and everyone's gaze went up to the Headmaster at the head table. I shivered when our eyes caught.

"Gin, not so loud." I ushered her but she always spoke her mind and being pregnant did nothing but reinforce that. Mostly it was endearing but now it was a little embarrassing. It was like he knew we were talking about him. He _is_ a capable Occlumens, I thought

"Oh who cares." She said paying more attention to her food than anything else. I sighed and pushed my plate away and stood.

"Where are you going?" She demanded. I sighed again, louder.

"To sleep. I'm exhausted." I said and dashed away before she could say that I never took naps at any time during the day. Oh well.

Harry was there to keep her company. It was another thing we all had noticed. Ginny couldn't stand being alone for any amount of time. Again it was usually endearing but sometimes it was annoying. But sometimes Ginny doesn't make much sense.

I was really headed to the Library, my fortress. I loved coming there. It was relaxing and students were rarely there…

I grabbed my books and headed to the table in the back corner and got comfortable. Or else I'd be paying for it in the morning. It was maybe two hours later that the door opened and pulled my attention from my book. Headmaster Snape was in the Library. Never had I seen him there and I would bet I was the student who spent the most time there.

He was heading to my table. I closed my book and sat very still. There was something very wrong with his expression.

"Miss Granger, I need you to come with me." I stood slowing and it felt like my mouth was wired shut. Ginny? Was she hurt? The baby?

The walk to the Great Hall was long and agonizing. He pushed open the doors and I saw my mother sitting there. In awe I took a step back. She was crying, or trying not too. But I'd seen her cry before. I knew her too well.

I vaguely saw Headmaster Snape take a seat in the corner of the room.

"Dad?" I asked and my voice cracked. She shook her head and I felt confused.

"Marie." She whispered and my heart froze in my chest. It stopped its beating. I felt the blood drain from my face.

"_Marie." _I ran to my mother and shook her hard.

"What happened?!"

"I'm so sorry Hermione. She just gave up. She gave up!"

Marie, the girl who I'd been raised with, who was my sister in every way but one.

"Where is she!?" I yelled and my mother shook her head again and again.

"She's gone, Hermione. I'm so sorry. "

"Gone?" I asked, echoing her. I backed away from her. She was reaching to pull something out and I knew exactly what it was. Marie and I talked about it before only now I saw it wasn't theoretical.

The letter. That betraying bitch. She promised me! Swore to me that she wouldn't ever leave me this way.

"Burn it." I told my mother but she shook her head.

"You'll regret it." She warned me.

"I already know what it says." I told her and suddenly something dawned on me.

"How are you here?" This was Hogwarts and my mother wasn't a witch.

"Headmaster Snape arranged this because I didn't want to bring you home. Marie and Kendra are the only ones besides us that you are close too. You're friends are here. You need to be here." My eyes darted to him in the corner and he was marking papers it seem but I could tell in the tension of his shoulders and neck that he was listening.

"I need….

"to stay here." She finished my sentence.

I closed my eyes and just took the letter from her.

"Bye Mum." I told her and ran from the room. I heard Headmaster Snape say something but it wasn't important. I ran and ran until I was down at the track again. It was dark out but I used my wand as my light.

"_So, you're pissed I bet. I get that. I did promise after all, but part of this, you know the heavy darkness all around me makes me forget about everyone but me. I'm thinking of what I need and want. Selfish I know but I'm sick Hermione. I can't stand all this fighting with my mom and there are a few things I haven't told you. But you kinda left me. All alone here in a world that couldn't shine as bright as yours. I tried to get better. To live but its too much. I can't do it anymore. You're gone. Mom never wants me around and I have no friends at all. I have the guys who want to fuck and I have the girls who torment me for letting them. You and I are so different after all. You wouldn't turn yourself into a whore. I did. I cant even feel that though. Its all numb. I don't feel at all. I've tried everything to feel alive again and nothing works. Mom wont here it. Thinks im making it all up for attention. _

_She caught me with Josh, the one with the nasty teeth, you know, in my room. Didn't even flinch. She shut the door and walked away. So I'm gonna go, maybe I'll see you again sometime. You're better off without me anyway. I'm broken and my times up, Hermione. I want you to know how important you are to me. You're going to have a marvelous life, I can feel it. I lie awake at night and think of all the great things you have in your world and I know you'll be okay. Now I bet you're crying now and I hate that. You have Harry, Ginny, Lavender and all those girls on the team. You have everything you need to succeed Hermione. Don't be sad over me. You are better than I was. I know I promised you sisters forever. I'm sorry. I love you. Goodbye._

_See you in the afterlife if witches go there._

I set the letter down in front of me and started to sob. It felt like half of me was gone. My sister was gone. Gone. The word repeated over and over and I was crying so loudly that I didn't hear the footsteps coming closer.

"Miss Granger, you are out after curfew. Come inside." I brushed my tears and followed the headmaster back into the school and even walked me to the common room.

"I expect you to report to classes tomorrow, but you're situation is understood by the faculty and you don't have to worry about participation." He said in an emotionless voice and walked away. I headed into the common room and Ginny, Lavender and Harry and even Ron were waiting for me.

But I wanted Marie. I started to cry and Ginny got to me first.

"Mione? What happened?"

I remembered Ron's reaction to Marie, when he met her two summers ago. He really liked her, so much he cheated with her. They all thought I didn't know, but I knew. Now after reading the letter it was reinforced.

"Marie." I said finally after controlling my tears. Ron stiffened; I could see it so clearly. Harry was confused.

"She killed herself last night." I sat down on the ground and wrapped my arms around my knees.

"No way." Ron echoed instantly.

"Yes. Yes yes yes yes! She did." I screamed and students from other years were coming down the stairs.

"Hermione lets go up to our room. Boys we'll see you tomorrow." Ginny said suddenly and pulled me up to my feet. I didn't fight her; I just didn't have the energy. Ron was paler than I'd ever seen him but he turned away from me and ran up the boys' stairs.

"Letter?" Ginny asked and I handed it to her because all the sudden it felt like it was burning a hole into my hand. Ginny read it in complete silence and set it on the nightstand.

"She was a coward Hermione. Not worth your tears." Ginny said softly. I shook my head.

"We…we were sisters. You don't leave your sister that way! She promised me, Ginny. Swore to me. " I said whispered.

"I'm so sorry."

I picked up the letter and pulled it out of the envelope. Another piece of paper was in it.

"_Hermione, you might not want to read this one. Please give it to Ron. You and Him may never be the same after he reads this and I'm so sorry for that. Ron and I have been seeing each other since we met that summer. He's everything to me but Its not enough. Nothing is enough. So give this to Ron. Please, for me._

_Ron, I know you're shocked by this, but I had no way out of the way I was feeling. I just couldn't stick around any longer. You hate me. I know. I hate me too for doing this, but I was so scared Ron. I couldn't be a mom. I'm a screw up. I do love you always have, don't you remember? You're my Sun, bright and full of life. When we touch its like flames. When we kiss…it's like nothing else in this world. _

_Just hold onto the good memories Ron, if you can. I'm sorry for leaving you all alone and for ruining you and Hermione's relationship. And I'm sorry for killing our son….please forgive me._

_I love you goodbye…."_

The letter fell from my fingertips and Ginny snatched it up. But I grabbed it from her and ran down the stairs and up the stairs to the boys room. I walked straight to Ron and shook him out of his trance.

"What on earth?" He said and sat up.

"She left this for you." I said and he lit his wand to read it. Looking at his face I could tell he'd been crying hard. He had really loved her. More than he ever loved me.

"No. No no, Marie, no my boy, my boy…" Ron muttered getting louder and louder and I wrapped my arms around him and held him as tightly as I could. He sobbed into my shoulder and let go more than I'd ever seen him. And even after all the pain I was in and he was in I still couldn't hate her for what she'd done. The anger would come.

Harry woke and came to see what was wrong. Ron was a mess and didn't see Harry take the letter. I felt tears run down my face but I was silent. Numb. Just like Ron would be soon. Crying did that to you.

"Dear Merlin…." Harry muttered and he ran to the door just as Ginny opened it. Harry gave her the letter and held her close.

Ron had lost what Harry would gain in a few months. Ron had lost his child. It had been taken from him.

"Mate, I'm so sorry."

Ron looked up at me ignoring Harry's voice and the pain in his eyes erased any bad blood between us.

"It's okay." I told him and he shook his head.

"I just told mum two days ago that she was pregnant."

My heart dropped. I knew Molly would grieve it like her own child.

"Lets go now, all of us." Ginny spoke up and we all were in agreement. We went out through Hogsmeade and apparated to the burrow.

Molly was still up at the late hour doing housework and once she saw our teary face. She ran to us.

Ron couldn't speak, he's gone so still. I swallowed my pain and spoke for him.

"Marie killed herself last night, Molly."

Molly gripped her chest and called loudly for Arthur and he ran down the steps faster than I'd ever seen him move.

"What is going on down here? Why are you kids out of school?" He demanded.

"Marie is gone, Arthur. Killed herself and our grandchild with her!"

"Ma?" Ron opened his mouth finally. Molly pulled him close.

"She killed my little boy. My boy, mum. How could she do that?" He asked her in a lost voice. He was so tormented right now and I could feel my heart breaking again over the sound of his voice. Ginny and Harry were embracing tightly and then the floo roared to life and Headmaster Snape stepped out of it gracefully.

"You all left the campus without permission." He said simply. No one mood so I nodded towards the door and to my surprise he followed.

"My friend died." I said and he nodded aware of this and of the circumstances of how she died.

"She was pregnant with Ron's son."

His mouth literally fell opened and anger was in his eyes but he didn't say anything for a long moment.

"You all may stay here tonight, but report to class promptly." He turned to head back inside.

"Thank you Headmaster." I said and he turned to him.

"You need not thank me but assure me this won't be repeated."

His meaning dawned on me. "It won't be." I answered with certainty. It couldn't happen again. He gave me a measuring look and I finally noticed him for the first time. The assumption I'd made of him when I was eleven wasn't even close to what he was now.

His black robes clung to him and his hair hung closer to his face. His nose seemed more proportioned and his eyes were the deepest black. If I focused on it, I could feel his magic radiating around him.

"Very well then." He said finally and went out the floo.

"All of you to go back-

I interrupted molly, "Actually the Headmaster has given us permission to stay with the promise we will be in class tomorrow."

Molly seemed to shrink with relief and we all were given a room. Arthur hadn't said a word and Ron hadn't left his mothers' side.

I didn't spare anyone a look and fell right into bed, with a brief thought of Headmaster Snape's eyes.


End file.
